Since Micheal Jackson's death on June 25th, 2009 - there have been 12 confirmed reports of devout fans ending their lives in response.
If you or anyone you know are even remotely considering suicide as a repercussion to the death of Micheal Jackson, I strongly urge you to take action immediately. Here is a list of possible options.
- Light your head on fire as MJ did in the infamous 1984 Pepsi Ad. To insure a fatality, take a kerosene bath beforehand.
- Reenact the Thriller video as a zombie by burying yourself into a deep dirt grave. Then run out of oxygen.
- Grow up as an a confused pop-star abused by your father, surgically alter your appearance beyond that of a human being, fuck lots of little boys, and ultimately become addicted to pain killers until your body shuts down with a heart attack in your sleep.
This article was originally published in the Friday June 19th 2009 edition of the Sierra Sun.
The Tour de Nez bicycle race extravaganza has descended upon Truckee once again. It's a blur of bright jerseys and rolling wheels all traveling at speeds in excess of 30 miles per hour. The downtown criterium is an hour long display of pure athleticism and team tactics. It takes a mix of brawn, cunning, courage and luck to stand atop the podium at the end.
Bike racing certainly looks like a lot of fun. You might find yourself thinking, "I'd like to do that."
Rich paused, as a sudden silence fell on the normally chatty group. Without opening his mouth, the loudspeaker roared in the tongue of an ancient demon,
The winner of this day's Air Center Criterium shall receive not one, but TWO no-holds bared, full-day tickets to thy fabled Wild Island Water Park!
In the distance, lighting crashed beyond the shadow of Mount Rose.
